Sunday, July 20, 2008

Non-fat Mozzarella Cheese

Okay, this is the set-up:

I was at the Kroger the other day, and I was in a hurry. I had a dentist appointment that I didn't want to be late for. So... I'm in a hurry, I don't have my glasses on (and are therefore nearly blind) and I see that the already shredded store brand mozzarella cheese is on sale. So I think, "Why not?" I mean, I already use their brand of block cheese and it's fine. So I picked up 3 packages of the stuff and I hurry home to put away the food before I rush off to the dentist. Then, a couple of days later I make a couple of quickie tortilla pizzas for Thomas and myself for lunch. And I see on the package that it says "Non-fat cheese". But I wasn't worried, how bad could it be?

Turns out folks that it is very bad indeed. The stuff doesn't melt like mozzarella cheese, it doesn't taste like mozzarella cheese and it doesn't smell like mozzarella cheese. I'm not really sure what it is, but my friends, it ain't cheese. It's some kind of weird, space-age technology, petroleum by-product, plastic, pretend food that I don't understand. And I don't want to understand it. It was nasty. Let me repeat myself: IT WAS NOT CHEESE. Avoid at all costs, people. I don't even think your body can digest it. It probably passes right thru entire, like when I was little and the dog ate one of my plastic army men (I was a strange girl child, what can I say) and it came out the other end and we found it in the yard many weeks later. Must have hurt like hell, but the dog didn't seem to take any lasting harm from it. Lived many more years thereafter. I have hopes that I will too, after ingesting this stuff.

Bottom line:
Price: cheap when on sale.
Would I buy this again? No, no, no. Hell NO!
Would I serve this to my friends? Nope, not even to my enemies, probably.
Would I recommend it? I would recommend that they stop calling this stuff "cheese" and I would recommend that they stop selling it as a "food" item. Other than that? Absolutely not.

I have decided that I will, in the future, limit my cheese health-o-meter to cheddar made with 2% milk. That's about as healthy as I'm willing to go with my cheese. I might have to cut the fat in my diet in other places and I might consider not eating as much but dammit! I ain't messing with the cheese no more! Its gonna be REAL cheese or nothing from now on, for this girl and her family. I'm not even sure something as fake as that stuff was is good for you anyway. It can't be.

End of this cheese story.


Arsenette said...

OMG.. I can't blame my not having my glasses on when I did the same mistake a few years ago.. Oooooooooh boy.. you know.. I'm all for eating healthy but sometimes.. fat needs to exist in something to make it .. right.. I mean.. this was the nastiest piece of .. yeah I love it.. weird, space-age technology, petroleum by-product, plastic, pretend food!

pamwax said...

Adkins is the diet of the day and cheese is OK...its protein. I am with you Holly...I do like my real cheese.

Jeannie said...

Oh, I missed your cheese blog until now. :(

I'm sorry about your bad cheese experience. I don't buy fat-free cheese for all of the reasons you mentioned. Hope you had "real" cheese to wash down the taste of the bad stuff.

Anonymous said...

I thought nonfat cheese was made from nonfat milk. Now you want me to believe it is made from a petroleum product. Where do you reside.

Healthy Guy said...

That was the craziest post I have ever seen about a nonfat item. It's the fat in dairy that causes arthritis, cancer, and other health problems.

Nonfat dairy will NOT cause arthritis or other health problems except maybe all the salt in cheese is not so healthy.

This post is rather misleading. You are what you eat! If you like eating fat, expect to get fat.

Fat does not pass through you. It gets stored on your body, and the only way you can get it off is through exercise.

So, nonfat is good. Animal fat is the worst of all the fats. Good vegetable fats are the fat of choice.

Anonymous said... know *all* that data about fat = bad has been blown out the window in the last 20 years, right? I mean like hands down reversal. Seriously, look it up.